After many years without training myself the colleagues, I had the opportunity to work on a coaching training myself, I had spent a full Saturday reviewing old booklets, books, courses and the certification material of coach the coach.
I had so much fun preparing the material and putting together exercises and fundamentals of coaching that I barely slept nights before the training, imaging how the reaction of the team would be – since I did put lots of love in the coaching workshop!
Some points were so important for me to review, as the 4 abilities of a good coach:
(From my training at http://www.coachinc.com/ccu/default.asp?s=1)
1) Contextual Listening
Avoid deciding what you will say in response while the individual is still talking; Say what you heard to verify; Set aside your own agenda; avoid making quick assumptions!
(“As you listen ask yourself, am I inhibiting, contaminating, or encouraging the other’s message?” – Sherod Miller)
2) Discovery Questioning
Use neutral, non-judgmental language; know when to ask closed questions and when to ask open-ended questions; continue to listen and use silence effectively; ASK QUESTIONS TO HELP THE INDIVIDUAL DISCOVER HIS OR HER OWN ANSWERS.
3) Messaging
Convert your message on a neutral one – with a neutral language.
Establish an environment that supports a good coaching mood.
Allow the time for the message to be fully heard and understood!
Really have an intention to move the coachee forward, do not focus on being a good coach and telling the right thing at the right moment – if you really support your coachee with love you will know!
4) Acknowledge
Focused feedback to acknowledge, celebrate or endorse positive contributions, learning and behaviors.
Be genuine and timely.
Reframe the situation with respect.
Become comfortable in being acknowledged – teach others to accept it.
Create an environment of being valued and valuing others.
This was only one part and one point, which I got inspired by the corporate coaching clinic, which I took while being coached by Penny:
http://www.corpalc.com/index.html
My conclusion of a good coach, hence, a good leader is:
The best coach does not have the answer, does not give the answer, but indeed is the one that “inspires” the coachee to find his / her own answers!!!
…and this works also for our private life!
I will share with you how the workshop went !